Monday, November 12, 2007
golly.i wish i could take back all the cursing i made about the chilly
spring weather. Because i definitely prefer that to the freaking weather
we experienced here today.39 degrees man!
watched "Butterfly Effect" last night. it was a pretty cool show.so the gist
of it is that he could go back in the past and change it just by reading his
journals.
how awesome would that be if we could do it?if i could do it.there's so
many things i wished i could change. i regret so many things i did do and
things i didn't do.but most of all its what i have done. this sounds crazy
but i really haven't forgotten many of the things i did. i was such a bitch
might still be.i don't know. I've been having quite a lot of flashbacks
which i want to forget. but i just can't. it's like i need forgiveness from
those people i had hurt. but i feel silly bringing up the past because they
would probably brush it off. I'm afraid it might bring negative feelings
back. like they remember everything and then things will turn out hell
awkward. i remember that i was super super petty before.oh my gosh, i
feel so embarrassed about it i wish i never existed.
and then there are the things i wish i had done. like stand up for myself.
and say 'NO'. yes, that must be my biggest regret. i could have stopped it.
and then things would have been very different. friends wouldn't act
weird around me. and people wouldn't gossip so much about what they
heard about me. or my parents and friends wouldn't have been so upset
for me.
I'm kinda glad that things are turning out a bit better, i guess it's because
everyone's growing older and are more mature.
I'M SINCERELY SORRY MY DEAR
FRIENDS.
7:53 PM
Breaking the Habit!