Friday, July 20, 2007
i was fucking tired today.i don't know why.i got up pretty late.it could be my contacts hey?has been bothering me for quite a while.
planned to sleep the minute i got back home.but i became such a fucking emotional wreck.it only hit me that i was going back in just three days time.how fucking fast is that?
going back there means:1)no life.fuckin hell.i'm serious!i need my mum to drive me around everywhere.the transport system is fucking hopeless.i'm not in the popular group and shit.so parties are out.my friends parents are hell strict.so they cant go out much.fuck.
2)fucking corpus shithole.english is driving me insane!and my fuckin teacher isnt helping me much.like so what if im doing well in every other subject?if i do shit in english,i cant fucking go to UNI!!and then there's the people.they may all look mature lah.but some of them are fucking immature fools and bitches.which annoys me to hell.
3)work.i know the pay might be damn high all.but it gets so sickening sometimes.like the customers and managers can piss you off so much!
i am so going to miss the late nights out.my independence.not having to rely on my parents.
part of the reason why i broke down tonight was because i felt so fucking frustrated with my parents.i think that feeling will never go away.i blame them for the hurt that i feel.
making me put in so much effort into o levels.and the certificate is now useless to me.
not giving me a chance to experience life in poly.i really really wanted to go to ngee ann.
anything that frustrates me is that they're so freaking overprotective!omg!like i'm only here for 2 weeks.i havent seen my friends for 6 months.they set me such early curfews.and they want to know every single detail.like who im with.where im going.hoe long for.all that kinda shit.okay fine so they want me back early.so my friends offer to come over to spend time with me.since i cant go out.and they're not happy either.what the fuck?then they're always on about how im spending too much time with my friends.always eating out.so i kept myself free for lunch today.they told me to,since saturday.but in the end they cancel it.dad says its a bit of a rush and my mum says she wants to do shopping instead.fuck lah.my mum's birthday was last tuesday right?wanted to bring her out for lunch but she was all like oh we're having dinner already.how bout next week?bitch lah.she doesnt even fucking care.
so fucking pissed off now.arghh!
and im thinking too.shit,this is my first holiday back after only 6 months.i have got fucking 5 more years to go till im done with studies and i can come back here to work.FUCK LAH!!life is such a bitch.
back to reality.in about 72 hours.
12:49 AM
Breaking the Habit!